Luke's Stuff
by thehumancoffeepot
Summary: In 7x01, Lorelai sorts through and throws away a pile of stuff that she says reminds her of Luke. These are my utterly fictional, completely fluffy, and generally light-hearted attempts to tell the stories behind those items. (One-shots, created solely from my mind, but they do fit with canon of seasons 5 and 6.)
1. Camouflage Skirt

_A/N: Hello hello everyone! This is a story I started working on probably about a year after Gilmore Girls went off the air. I published the first 2 chapters on another site and got generally favorable reviews, so I've decided to bring it back here and (hopefully) finish it. Probably will be 5 chapters by the end for 5 different items which Rory specifically mentions in 7x01._

_Enjoy! x_

* * *

_"This is Luke's?" Rory asked skeptically, holding up a ruffled camouflage mini-skirt._

_"No, this is mine, but I wore it with Luke when we went to see Jarhead. I was trying to look kind of Army and something about the combination of the movie and the hot dogs at the Waterbury Cineplex made me sick in the parking lot and Luke held my hair and it was nice… and now I gotta get rid of it."_

* * *

**Early season 5 - just a few months post ****_Written in the Stars_**

Luke knocked on the front door twice before sighing loudly and opening it. "Lorelai!" he called as he walked towards the stairs.

"Oh hey babe, you're early!" her voice filtered down.

"Not early, you're just not ready on time," he called back, climbing the stairs. "As usual," he muttered.

"Yes, but you should know by now to factor in an extra 15 to 30 minutes for me to finish looking gorgeous. And, since you KNEW our date was at 6:30 and that I'm always late, your getting here at 6:30 was downright foolish."

Luke reached the doorway to her bedroom and leaned against it as she continued to yell from the closet.

"I mean, come on Luke, you have been on enough dates with me by now, buddy. You can't blame me because you refuse to learn. It's like if you ate my cooking one time and then you were violently ill for three days. Yeah, that's my fault because I can't cook but if you ate it AGAIN? Voluntarily? Come ON, dude. Fool me once, shame on… someone. Fool you… twice? Or, wait, I don't actually know how that goes. Is it fool-?"

"It's 'Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me,'" he responded wryly.

Her head popped out of the closet suddenly. "Oh, hi, I didn't know you were in here!"

"Yes, the yelling tipped me off to that," he said.

"Well, you're in luck because I am juuuust… about… ready," she grunted, having immersed herself in the closet once again.

"Would asking what you're doing actually lead to a logical answer?" Luke asked.

"Um… yes."

"So?"

"What?"

"So what are you doing?" Luke asked, exasperated.

"Oh. Well I haven't worn this skirt in awhile and it's a little… tight," she responded.

"Sounds fine to me," he grinned.

Lorelai finally emerged completely from the closet with a laugh. "What do you think?" she asked, spinning around in a circle.

Luke looked her up and down, taking in the camouflage miniskirt, pink heels, and light pink t-shirt. "Um, I think you look great," he said, closing the distance between them. He put his hands on her hips and continued, "but I did not realize that 'the Army has your soldier'." He gestured at the words across her chest.

"Oh, that. Yeah, um, honestly I got this shirt at the flea market when Rory was about… 12?"

"Because the Army had your soldier then?" Luke asked, rubbing one of her arms affectionately.

"Oh no. God no, I don't really do that whole public-pained-love-let-me-tell-you-how-much-I-miss -my-man thing. I got the shirt because all of these creepy single dads always hit on me at Rory's school things and I thought the shirt would deflect them." She turned away and began gathering things to put in her purse.

"How did that work out?"

"Actually, it backfired terribly. I'm ready, by the way, let's go," she said as she headed out the door and back down the stairs. "It turns out the only thing hotter than a single mom is a lonely Army wife who just might be vulnerable enough for a one-night tryst with a single dad. Go figure."

Luke opened the front door for her as he replied, "You DO realize that that shirt is going to make people think I am the single dad and THIS is the tryst?" They continued across the lawn to his truck. "And then they're going to see us at a movie about the Army and think we're both insanely terrible people because your soldier is off fighting for our freedom while we go on a clandestine date to see a movie about soldiers fighting for our freedom?"

Lorelai, having just sat down in the passenger seat, smiled at him. "You have officially been Gilmore-ed, Lucas Danes."

"Gilmore-ed?" he questioned as he walked around the front of the truck and climbed into the driver's seat.

"Yes, but the GOOD Gilmore-ed, not the kind Richard and Emily do. You have been Lorelai Gilmore-ed."

"How is that?" he asked, backing down the driveway.

"Because not only are you paying attention to what other people think of you, you are also creating imaginary scenarios in your head about things that probably won't happen," Lorelai explained matter-of-factly as she jabbed at the buttons on his radio.

"Stop doing that," he said impatiently.

"I want music, and your radio is crazy," she whined.

"It's not crazy, it's just a little temperamental," he said, pressing several buttons with his right hand while driving with his left.

"Um, yeah no. A child is temperamental. I'm temperamental when I'm hungry. THIS thing is beyond temperamental. This is Tom Cruise during that interview with Matt Lauer. This is Mike Tyson with an ear in his mouth. This is- oh," she trailed off as the sound filtered through.

"You're ridiculous," Luke said.

"A little." Lorelai slipped her hand into his free right one and they drove on in silence for a few minutes.

"I don't mind being Lorelai Gilmore-ed," Luke said suddenly, stroking her hand with his thumb. "As long as it's because I've been around you too long, it's ok in my book."

Lorelai stared at him in surprise. "Hon," she said simply. He raised their joined hands and kissed hers gently. Then he turned his eyes back to the road and cleared his throat loudly.

"So are you excited about this movie?"

* * *

"Um, Luke I need to leave," Lorelai whispered urgently.

"What?" He turned to look at her, a piece of popcorn halfway to his mouth.

"I feel sick, I need to leave like, now."

"Oh. Ok, yeah, let's go," he whispered back. He stood up and led the way out of the theater as Jarhead played on behind them. "Do you need to go to the bathroom?" Luke asked as they emerged into the lobby.

"Uhh… no. I mean, yes, I need to puke, but I don't want to puke in a public bathroom," she explained as she made a beeline for the exit.

They barely made it to some bushes near the theater before Lorelai started vomiting. Luke, having dealt with a drunken Liz many times in high school, knew that the best thing to do in this situation was to hold back her hair. He grabbed most of it with one hand in a makeshift ponytail and stroked her back with the other. "It's ok, you're fine," he muttered.

"Luke, no offense," she gasped after several minutes, "but this is that last thing in the world I want you to see or do with me."

"It's fine," he said, tentatively letting her hair down and helping her up. "I don't mind."

"You don't mind watching me throw up four hot dogs into a bush?" she asked incredulously. "Which, yeah, by the way, three hot dogs wasn't enough, I just HAD to have a fourth. Good move, Lorelai."

"I don't mind watching you throw up," Luke repeated, stroking her cheek. "Are you ok?"

"I guess," she said ruefully. "But I would really like to go home now."

"Ok. Go ahead to the car, I'll be right there."

Lorelai nodded. Luke walked back into the theater and returned a few minutes later with an empty popcorn tub. He passed it to Lorelai as he started the ignition. "This is for if you need to get sick again," he explained.

"Thanks," she responded sadly.

"What's wrong?" he asked with concern.

"I'm mad I puked," she said, raising her eyes to him. "And I'm mad you were there."

"Lorelai, I don't care that you puked," he said in confusion, stroking her shoulder.

"Yeah, but _I _do!" she yelped, throwing her hands up in exasperation. "I've been running around like a crazy person at the inn and you work all the time too. We sleep at different times, we work at different times, we have like TWO shared interests, one of which is movies that involve guns. Tonight could have been perfect, but no. Instead my gross eating habits ruined our date! And I really did want to see that movie, Luke," she finished, hanging her head.

"Lorelai," he said calmly. "It's ok. We will come back and see this movie again without the hot dogs. You didn't _ruin_ our date, ok?" He tilted her chin up with one hand and, seeing that she was still upset, he asked, "Do you think you'll be sick again?"

"No, I feel fine now that I pumped my own stomach," she said, rubbing her belly.

"Then why don't you spend the night with me, at the diner? Caesar is taking the day off tomorrow and Lane's not coming in until noon. I think the citizens of Star's Hollow can go one day without Luke's breakfast, don't you?"

She smiled widely. "As long as I am not included in that group of citizens," she said, fiddling with the buttons on his shirt.

"Of course not. You get breakfast every day," he said, leaning towards her.

"Thank you, Luke."

He smiled. "This is usually the point where I would kiss you," he whispered conspiratorially in her ear, "but you just threw up and I have limits."

"Oh, so romantic," she said, slapping his chest playfully. "Let's go before I change my mind about spending the night with you."

Luke laughed at her empty threat and steered the truck out of the parking lot.


	2. Pom-Pom Socks

_A/N: Hello again! First of all, thank you all for your kind reviews. I love them all, and I appreciate everyone taking the time to give feedback!_

_Onto a new chapter! In that 7x01 scene, Rory simply mentions that some "pom-pom socks" are getting trashed; there is no context at all so this one is 100% from my mind. I decided to craft it as a fight and some fluff. It could really be set anywhere but I'm choosing to say late season 5/early season 6 but before the renovations to Lorelai's house._

_Enjoy! x_

* * *

Luke was wholly unsurprised that Lorelai's front door was unlocked. It had been unlocked every single time he had ever come over, as far as he could remember, and no amount of rants about personal safety and burglars could convince Lorelai that Star's Hollow could, in fact, have robberies.

He pushed the door open, halfway through the sentence: "Lorelai, for the love of-" but he trailed off. The house smelled funny. Like… ashes? He took a few steps forward before he noticed that there was a cloud of thick grey smoke coming from the kitchen.

"Oh God," Luke said. He dropped the grocery bags he was carrying and raced into the nearly obscured room. "Lorelai!" he yelled. "LORELAI!" He instantly perceived that the source of the smoke was the oven.

He coughed loudly, fanning the air, and quickly turned the appropriate knob to cut off the oven. "LORELAI," he screamed frantically as he unlocked (of COURSE it was locked) the back door and flung it open to relieve some of the smoke.

Feeling confident that he wouldn't suffocate now, he turned swiftly to the drawer where he kept his oven mitts and smashed them onto his hands. "LORELAI, WHERE ARE YOU?" he yelled loudly. Still hearing no response, he groaned and yanked the oven open.

As expected, he saw nothing but flames. "Dammit, dammit!" he yelled in frustration.  
"LORELAI, GODDAMMIT!" He fled quickly to the back porch and yanked up the bucket he kept there for when the porch roof leaked. Thankfully, it had rained recently and it was nearly full of water. He raced back into the kitchen and, never pausing, threw the entire contents into the oven.

A loud hissing noise and some weak flickers of flame. The fire was out. Luke was briefly triumphant before realizing that he still didn't know where Lorelai was.

He glanced quickly into Rory's room, which was visible now that most of the smoke had cleared, then vaulted up the stairs. She wasn't in the bathroom or her bedroom or her closet. At this point, Luke was a little panicked. "LORELAI!" he cried yet again as he thundered back down the stairs.

"What?"

Luke skidded into the kitchen and then backtracked quickly to see Lorelai coming in the front door, bewildered. "Why are you screaming?" she asked in confusion.

"Lorelai, Jesus," Luke said, striding over to her and hugging her quickly.

"Oh well, hi," she laughed into his shoulder, bewildered.

"Where the hell WERE you?" he asked, pulling back to grasp her at arm's length.

"I ran to Babette's for a second to help her decide which sunglasses she should get Morey for his birthday. Do you know she actually gets him a new pair once a year? Who knew, they always look the same to you, right?" She paused in distraction and wrinkled her nose in disgust. "Why does my house smell like death right now?"

Luke dropped her shoulders. "Yeah, well probably because when I got here your OVEN was on fire," he said.

"Oh no!" she cried out, running towards the kitchen. "My pom-pom socks!"

Luke turned and watched her for a minute in disbelief before stalking off after her.

"Lorelai, do you mean to tell me that the fire in your oven was because of-"

"My pom-pom socks!" she wailed, shoving a crispy black thing into his face sadly. "I put them in there to toast a little before you got here and I guess they caught on fire."

Luke gaped. "Your pom-pom socks?"

"They are- or, well, they WERE my favorite socks," she said, plucking the matching crispy black thing out of the oven with a frown and a cough.

"Is this seriously your explanation?" he said, his tone deadly.

"Well… yeah. I would have put them in the dryer," she said, taken aback by his sudden attitude. "But I have a load of clothes in there right now and I just wanted the socks so I popped them…. in…. for a minute." She trailed off. "Luke, stop GLARING at me!"

"So you 'popped your socks in'," he said in a sarcastically peppy tone. "Into an oven which, **by the way**, has been cooked in recently so there was all kinds of grease and residue to catch your idiotic pom-poms on fire. And then, after you made that wise choice, you ran to Babette's for a minute and left the oven on?" He was in disbelief, pausing nearly between each word for emphasis.

Lorelai sat down on the closest chair and shrugged defensively. "Well, Luke! When you say it like that, it sounds stupid."

"It WAS stupid!" he burst out angrily. "It WAS stupid, Lorelai! It was extremely stupid! You could have burnt your entire house down, with you in it! And what happened to your smoke alarm, huh?"

Lorelai colored visibly. "Oh. That. Um… the one in the kitchen started making this annoying beepy noise a few months ago and I was going to mention it to you, but then it just kind of stopped so I thought maybe it wasn't important?" she finished, a note of pleading in her voice.

"So the battery died," Luke supplied.

"Oh, um, yeah, well that could have happened, sure," she volunteered. "I was thinking more along the lines of the smoke detector got over its' beef and it just kind of stopped whining at me once every thirty minutes."

Luke stared at her, shaking his head angrily.

"Are you going to say anything?" she asked in annoyance, finally responding appropriately to his mood.

"I don't know what else there is to say," he spat. "You let your smoke detectors die and then did pretty much everything in your power to burn the house down, so no. I have nothing to say about how childish and irresponsible that was."

"Okay, that's enough," Lorelai stood up, suddenly riled. "Watch it, Luke. Don't you dare come bursting into MY house and then lecture me about how I live."

"Oh, hah," he laughed bitterly. "Yeah, how DARE I? How DARE I come into this house through the UNLOCKED door and then put out the fire that you set by roasting your socks. How DARE I do that so that you can actually still HAVE a house! Man, that was a bad decision, shouldn't have done that, Danes!" he threw out sarcastically.

"Hey!" Lorelai cried. "Stop it right now. I will not have you chastise me because I made a mistake, Luke. People make mistakes, people have accidents!"

"Not by nuking their socks, they don't!" Luke lifted his arms in exasperation. "Normal people cause small fires because they don't know how to work the new gas range or because they forget to turn the back - "

"Burner off," Lorelai finished, looking down at her feet. "Yeah, I get it, Luke. Normal people are much wiser and better and SMARTER than me."

"Lorelai," he said softly, feeling a twinge of guilt for his harshness.

"So thanks for saving the house," she said, speaking over him in a robotic tone. "I don't really feel up to a date so I'll just see you tomorrow, good-night." She shoved past him without ever meeting his eyes, but Luke could tell that she was near tears.

He slumped into the nearest chair and hung his head in defeat as he heard her footsteps ascend the stairs. He could let her cool down for the night, but that might also give her time to stew. That was never good.

After several minutes, Luke pulled himself away from the table. He was not the best at dealing with conflicts, so he decided to just do some practical things until he could make up his mind.

Luke walked slowly back into the foyer to gather the groceries he had dropped. He was supposed to cook dinner for himself and Lorelai; that plan being obviously cancelled at this point, he simply placed the groceries in various cabinets and shelves that seemed to make sense. There was very little non-processed food to guide him, but he felt ok about it in the end. Then he set about checking and repairing the oven. Luckily, there was next to no major damage; it appeared to have been mostly a smoke fire. Luke scrubbed the racks and sides until he felt confident that no more fires would be starting anytime soon.

Finally, he grabbed a stool from Rory's room and pulled down the smoke detector. It just needed batteries, but of course the shelf where the batteries were kept contained one AAA battery and a 9 volt which had seen better days - NOT the six AA's he needed.

* * *

Luke returned from the store a half hour later with a small bag and a small smile. He had really only gone for the batteries, but a little display at the check-out line had given him inspiration. He changed the batteries quickly and tidied up the kitchen. Then, taking a deep breath, he headed up the stairs.

Lorelai had not closed her bedroom door, which was an excellent sign. Luke knew this meant that she was hoping he would eventually come upstairs to resolve their fight. He peeked his head tentatively around the door frame. She was curled up in the middle of the bed, facing away from him. He knew that she heard him as he removed his shoes and placed the crinkly paper bag on the table beside her. She said nothing, however, so he went ahead with his plan and crawled into the bed with her.

Lorelai stiffened slightly as Luke's arm snaked around her waist, but he placed a gentle kiss on her neck anyways. "I was scared," he said, his mouth on her ear.

She huffed loudly and rolled over to face him. "You WHAT?"

"When I came into the house and it was smoky," he explained, brushing her hair from the side of her face so he could cradle her cheek. "And I couldn't find you."

She smacked his hand away impatiently, but gently. "What, did you think I was DEAD?" She was trying to sound harsh, but Luke heard the genuine concern in her voice.

"I don't know," he shrugged. "I don't know what I thought. I just knew that I needed to find you and make sure you were okay."

He thought he detected a slight softening in her expression, but she instantly hardened again. "Still, you didn't have to be such an ass," she grumbled.

"Lorelai," he sighed, placing his hand firmly on her cheek again. "Imagine if you came into the diner and it was filled with nothing but smoke. And you went into the kitchen and you put the fire out with water or baking soda or something and the whole time you were screaming for me to make sure I was okay, but I wasn't answering."

"That sounds a_ little_ scary," she conceded reluctantly. "Overlooking this alternate reality where I know to put out a fire with baking soda."

He grinned slightly at her returning banter. "Yeah, well. You did know in this world, and you put the fire out. And then imagine that you came upstairs and I was asleep in the bed, and I basically said, 'Oh, a fire? Yeah, now that I think of it, I did leave that hamburger on the grill before I went to bed. And I probably shouldn't have let the smoke alarms die three months ago, either. Oh well!' How would you feel then?"

"I would probably be pissed at you," Lorelai admitted in a very small voice.

"Exactly. I was annoyed because it would mean a lot to me if you would take your safety a little more seriously, okay?" Luke said, kissing her gently on the forehead. "Though, for what it's worth, I am sorry for how mean I was. You are not irresponsible or stupid."

"Well, you never actually called ME stupid," she sighed, sitting up and running a hand through her curls. "I overreacted when you said that word." She laced her fingers through his and continued speaking while staring absentmindedly ahead of her. "I don't know, Luke, I guess you just hit a nerve when you said that because of my parents, and my life. You know, I've always - "

"Lorelai," Luke interrupted, gazing at her from his horizontal position.

"Hm?"

"I love you."

Her eyes snapped to his. "You… what?"

"I love you," he repeated, pulling himself into a cross-legged position in front of her. "I was scared when I saw that smoke because I couldn't find you. In my head, I know you're smart and competent and can take care of yourself. And I also knew that the fire wasn't big enough to put you in danger. But in my heart, I just - I just had to find you. Nothing else mattered. It was just you. It's just you, because… I love you."

Lorelai stared at him in shock. She clutched her hands in front of her heart and gazed at him for several moments. "Oh, Luke, wow. You know I love you, too. So much, God. I love you so much," she babbled, nearly crying as she tried to verbalize her affection for him.

"Well I do now," he grinned. She laughed awkwardly and pulled his face to hers for a long, sweet kiss.

"I got you something," he murmured against her lips.

"Mmmk," she murmured back, pulling his face more firmly against hers.

Luke pulled away momentarily. "I won't remember to give it to you if you don't stop," he laughed.

"Ugh, a quandary!" Lorelai cried as she flopped backwards onto her pillows. "Present… kissing Luke… present… kissing Luke," she said, making the scale motion with her hands. "Okay, how about - you give me the present and then we kiss?"

"Sounds good," he agreed, tossing the paper bag at her playfully.

"Elegantly wrapped, babe," she said sarcastically, tearing off the paper like a three-year-old. "Oh Luke!"

She pulled the hot pink and red pom-pom socks out of the bag and hugged them to her chest. "You got me new socks."

"I did," Luke confirmed. "As long as you don't toast them."

"Agreed!" Lorelai cried, flinging them off the bed happily. "Now let's kiss!" He laughed against her mouth as she launched herself at him. He managed to maneuver her onto her back while suspending himself above her. He broke their mouth-to-mouth contact to trail kisses down her neck and collarbone...

"Um, Luke," she interrupted. He sighed and lifted his head to look into her eyes. "I really enjoy where you're going right now, I do," she explained, "but you were supposed to cook me dinner and I'm starving to death slowly."

He rolled his eyes. "Starving to death, really?"

"Have you ever met me?" she asked innocently.

Luke heaved a sigh and reluctantly pulled himself off of the bed, extending his hand to help her up. "Let's go."

"Ooh, wait," Lorelai said as he started to pull her towards the door. "Let me put my socks on first!"

Luke dropped her hand and watched her back as she giddily pulled the socks over her feet. He couldn't help but grin. He was a grumpy guy, and he didn't always appreciate the good things in his life, but he found himself wondering, yet again, what he had done to deserve this woman.

* * *

_A/N2: When I published this story previously, a few reviewers were unhappy with my characterization of Lorelai as overly childish or unreasonably careless. That is a completely valid critique and I truly value each and every constructive review I get. For the record, I based this idea on the beginning of episode 5x06, where Luke picks up Lorelai for a date and she explicitly mentions leaving her socks in the oven to "toast" and also not locking her door, not changing her front porch light, and a whole variety of other unsafe behaviors. I'm not trying to be defensive, because I see in hindsight what those reviewers meant. Although no one but ASP could really know whether or not this is something Lorelai would do, I still feel like it's a valid representation of her. Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed it regardless!_


	3. Books

_A/N: Love reviews, love them! Thank you all! Now, to be honest, this chapter got away from me a little bit. I wanted to do a L/L Christmas (since Gilmore Girls cheated us out of that particular delight), I wanted to see Luke giving Lorelai a romantic gift that he actually took the time to pick out (*cough cough* Vineyard Valentine), and I wanted to talk about the books Rory mentions in 7x01 (since that's the point of this story). The result is this loooong, dialogue-heavy account of the L's first Christmas as a couple. Enjoy! x_

_(P.S. I'm entering a busy stretch of life these next few weeks, so it might take me a little while to get the next few chapters up. But fear not - they are coming!)_

* * *

_"So all these books remind you of Luke?"_

_"Yeah. Those are books I gave him to read, but he never did."_

_"Oh, Cormac McCarthy, good call. In Cold Blood, he would've loved that."_

_"Well, we'll never know now."_

_"And you wanted him to read Hammerhead Sharks: Demons of the Deep?"_

_"He recommended that one for me."_

* * *

**Season 5 - First Christmas**

Lorelai stumbled into Luke's, struggling with the weight of about 15 colorful shopping bags. "Luke! Luuuke!" she called out into the abandoned room as she attempted to close the door with her foot.

"We're closed!" she heard his grumpy voice come from the kitchen.

"Luke!" she cried adamantly. "I'm not a customer, I'm your GIRLFRIEND!"

He emerged from the kitchen and, seeing her feeble attempts to close the door, rushed over to help. After several of the bags had been placed on the nearest table and the door had been successfully closed, Lorelai turned to Luke with hands on her hips. "'We're _closed_?'" she asked scathingly.

Luke just rolled his eyes and headed back to the kitchen. "We ARE closed."

Lorelai seated herself at the counter. "Yes, but you're not closed for ME!"

"Look, I couldn't hear who it was over the fryer," he said.

"Oh yeah, a likely excuse!" she grumbled. "Why are you frying stuff anyways? If you're closed - and, after the conversation we've had thus far, there is no doubt in my mind that you ARE, in fact, closed - then you shouldn't have any food left to serve."

There was a pause. Lorelai heard a few noises that she vaguely recognized as being related to cooking, and then Luke emerged from the kitchen with a cheeseburger and fries. He placed the plate in front of her and said simply, "This is for you."

"Oh." She picked up a single fry and bit it, smiling timidly at him. "Sorry?"

"It's fine," he responded in typical Luke fashion as he poured her a cup of coffee. "I would have expected nothing less from you after a long day of shopping."

"Oh yes, the shopping," Lorelai said, her eyes lighting up. "The shopping was so successful, Luke, you would not believe the things I found."

"I bet I would," he said distractedly, punching some numbers on his calculator.

"Why is that?" she asked, taking a humongous bite out of her burger.

"Because every single year at Christmas, you come in with all of these bags, you drop them all over the tables, and then you tell me that you found Rory the perfect book that she doesn't have yet or at least you don't think she has it yet. Then you tell me that you bought Sookie whatever cooking thing they told you to get at that fancy cooking store -"

"Williams-Sonoma."

"Sure, fine. And THEN you explain to me that because you've been shopping there for Sookie for so many years, you've struck up a friendship with a flamboyantly gay man -"

"Paul."

"Who helps you decide what to get Sookie each year. Then you tell me that you found something acceptable for your father and something that your mother won't like anyways. But it's ok because you just have to drop the gifts off at the Christmas party and then you don't have to personally witness the look of disappointment on your mother's face."

"Not that I'm not used to it," Lorelai responded.

"You say that every year, too," Luke said dryly. "Then you say that this year might just be the year you'll slip something dirty like edible underwear or a sex toy into the gift for your mother."

"But I never do."

"Exactly," Luke said, throwing his hands up. "You see, you're predictable. You say the same thing every Christmas."

"Hm, maybe," Lorelai said, tilting her head. "That particular speech, however, just made me realize that you _really _needed a life for the last 12 years. You seriously had nothing better to do than memorize my post-Christmas shopping explanation?"

Luke shrugged. "I was pining, remember?"

"Ah, yes. Ava Gardner and such."

Luke rolled his eyes and walked around the counter. He seated himself on the stool beside her. "Hello, by the way," he said, kissing her gently.

"Hey," she responded quietly. She tucked her head into his shoulder as he enveloped her into his arms. "You smell good."

"I smell like a diner."

"You smell like Luke," she countered.

Luke smiled and kissed her hair. "I missed you today. Why did you have to go all the way to New York for your shopping?"

"Can't you just queue up the instant replay of my Christmas speech? I'm sure I've explained it before," Lorelai said, pulling back with a grin.

"Well, I could do that, but I think I've deprived you of enough fun today," Luke said.

"You go to New York for the atmosphere, Luke, the atmosphere!" she explained as if it were the most obvious answer in the world.

"And here we go," he said, carrying her plate back to wash it off.

"It's the people and the places and the stores and the smells," she began happily. "Shopping in New York is much different than shopping anywhere else, Luke. The people in New York are pros, they shop the way we _breathe_, like it's the most natural thing in the world. And in a way, it's nice to put on a fancy outfit for a day and walk through the crowded streets with all these shopping bags, like you regularly blow hundreds of dollars on pointless items. It's just a good feeling to run with the big city folk for a few hours." She paused to sip some coffee. "And that, my friend is why I go to New York."

Luke reappeared. "Nothing you just said makes any sense to me personally. But I guess as long as you had fun, it doesn't matter."

"Story of us, don't you think?" she said, holding her cup up for a refill.

He frowned. "Do you really need a second cup this late?"

"Uh… yes," she said, shaking her head at his naiveté. As usual, Luke sighed and obliged. "Hey, Luke?"

"Hm?" he asked, going back to the register to finish totaling some bills.

"Shopping was a little different this year than it has been in the past."

"Why is that?"

"Well… because this year I have a boyfriend who makes me extremely happy and I felt like I had to get him something extra special."

Luke looked up. "You really didn't have to get me anything special."

"I _know_, Luke, but I wanted to. And if you will help me carry these bags up to your apartment, we can have a pre-Christmas tonight!"

"What the hell's a pre-Christmas?"

"Is that a serious question?"

"Does this face look like I'm joking?" Luke asked, completely deadpan.

"I keep forgetting what a sad life you've had," she sighed. "Ok, well, Luke, as it has fallen to me yet again to explain a basic holiday to you, I will do my best to convey the joy that is pre-Christmas."

"Goody," he muttered.

"The first rule of pre-Christmas is that you cannot be surly," she said, narrowing her eyes.

"This doesn't sound like a good holiday for me."

"Ignoring you now. The second rule of pre-Christmas is that you cannot say anything negative about pre-Christmas."

"Yes, Fuhrer," he said, making an odd half-bow.

"Are you insinuating that my rules are akin to those of _Hitler?" _she asked in disbelief. "Actually, you know what, I'm still ignoring you. Moving on. Pre-Christmas is essentially a day which functions as Christmas for those groups of people who will not be together on the real Christmas day."

"Like us?"

"Precisely like us," she said, smiling kindly. "I knew you would catch on eventually. Now, because I am being shanghaied by the Gilmores all day and you are attending Christmas dinner with Liz and TJ -"

"A dinner which we set up for the sole purpose of me missing Christmas with your parents," Luke supplied.

"That's the one," Lorelai said cheerily. "Because I'll be in Hartford and you'll be here with Liz and TJ, we will probably not see each other all day on Christmas. So, the solution to this terrible predicament is to have pre-Christmas now!"

"I see," Luke said, "and what does a pre-Christmas entail?"

"Oh, you know, the usual," she said, nodding. "We have to give each other our presents, and then we have to make those terrible yet delicious Pillsbury cookies shaped like Christmas trees - don't worry, I brought some - and then we have to watch _It's a Wonderful Life_. Oh, and you have to swap your handy dandy baseball cap for this!" she finished, pulling a Santa hat out of one of her bags with a flourish.

Surprisingly, Luke did not even protest. He just sighed and, taking the Santa hat, jammed it onto his head. "Let's get these bags upstairs," he grumbled.

Lorelai squealed happily and launched herself at him. "Thank you thank you thank you!" she cried, hugging him fiercely.

"You're welcome," he said, disentangling himself. "But no more coffee."

"Mean!"

"Get the rest of these bags before I change my mind."

* * *

An hour later, all of the packages were relocated, the smell of Christmas cookies was wafting through Luke's tiny apartment, and Lorelai was rummaging through Luke's dresser.

"What are you doing?" he asked as he emerged from the bathroom in sweatpants.

"I am looking for a shirt that will match my Santa hat."

"Your Santa hat is purple."

"I know that, Luke."

"I don't have any purple shirts," he said, flopping onto the bed with a groan.

Lorelai turned away from the dresser with a sigh. "Yes, I'm noticing that. I guess I'll have to wear my First Date Floor Show Flannel." She grabbed said shirt and headed into the bathroom. "One day, though, the sheer sexiness of seeing me in this shirt is going to wear off and you are going to wish that you had more variety of colors in your wardrobe."

"Purple is probably the only color I don't have in my wardrobe."

"Psh, oh, really?" she said, throwing herself onto the bed beside him. "Pink? You have pink?"

"You know I don't have any pink flannel shirts."

"Precisely. How about yellow?"

"Yellow isn't practical for the diner," Luke said defensively. "If you spill something on it, you see it all day!"

"Luke, you don't have _any _shirts that are girl colors, just face it."

"As hard as it is for me to admit, that is probably because I'm not a girl," Luke said in exasperation.

"Well, that's good. Otherwise our relationship would be very modern," she said with a frown. "Hey! Where is your Santa hat?"

"Oh, I thought I could… take it off now," Luke said dodgily, fumbling with the handle on his nightstand.

Lorelai's mouth fell open. "Luke! You have got to be kidding me! You hid your hat in your nightstand and thought I wouldn't notice."

"No, I... didn't," he said with a forced laugh.

Lorelai squinted menacingly. "Luke," she said slowly.

They stared at each other for a moment before Lorelai let out something that could only be described as a war cry. She threw herself on top of him in a fierce attempt to reach the nightstand, but Luke was ready; he grabbed her in a tried and true defensive wrestling position and flipped her back over to her side of the bed. She struggled in vain for a few moments before finally slumping dejectedly onto the pillows.

Luke held himself above her, smirking. He released one of her arms long enough to brush the hair away from her eyes. Lorelai's frustrated expression melted away as she met his eyes. "You are pretty beautiful, you know that?" he whispered.

"As long as you think so," she said quietly. He lowered his body, push-up style, and gave her a sweet, long , lingering kiss.

"I definitely think so," he responded after a few moments, and then rolled over onto his side, capturing her waist with his right hand as his left formed a cushion for her head.

Lorelai smiled brilliantly as she nuzzled her body closer to his. Somehow it never seemed like they were close enough. He layered kisses down her cheek and neck, his right hand roaming higher, gently squeezing random parts of her side.

"Mmm," she moaned quietly, languishing in his touch. Luke responded by raising his mouth from her neck and kissing her mouth passionately. She wriggled herself even closer to him, involuntarily pushing her hips forward to meet his.

Luke groaned. "God, you are… the_ sexiest_ person," he mumbled as he pulled her waist towards him roughly. He returned his mouth to her neck, biting and sucking the area just below her ear lobe that she liked so much. His hands wandered down and he began unbuttoning his own shirt, the one currently concealing her perfect body from view…

"Wait, wait," she gasped suddenly. Luke didn't stop; instead, he placed a long kiss on her collar bone, then lower, lower, inching towards her breast. "God that feels good," she gasped, momentarily distracted. But then –"Ok, Luke, seriously – wait."

He groaned in disappointment, but he obeyed. "You're going to tell me to stop so that we can do pre-Christmas, aren't you?" he asked, flopping back onto the bed.

Lorelai laughed shakily, still trying to catch her breath. "Something like that," she responded as she placed one more light kiss on his lips. "Ok… presents!"

Luke glowered at her. "I was ok with this holiday until it interfered with us having sex."

"Oh please, you were _tolerating _this holiday, at best," she replied distractedly, rummaging through her bags and removing a few gift-wrapped packages. "And besides, when have I ever denied you sex?"

Luke pondered this question as he climbed off the bed and pulled his own wrapped bundles from the top shelf of his closet. "Good point. Never."

Lorelai grinned at him from her spot on the bed. "Aw, Luke, you have my presents!"

"Of course I have your presents. It's December 23rd."

She frowned. "Well don't say it like that. I look like a slacker for just getting yours today."

He rolled his eyes as he sat back down in front of her. "You are exhausting."

"I know. Ok, you open yours first."

She pushed three bulky wrapped boxes towards him and he shook one suspiciously. "You didn't go over the limit?"

"I did not go over the limit," Lorelai said, raising her hand in an attempt at a Scout's Honor salute. They had, after much debate, decided to set a $50 limit on what they could spend on each other for Christmas and other major holidays. This was in large part because Lorelai had publicly threatened suicide if she had to hear Luke's "holidays-are-just-excuses-for-wasteful-consumeris m" rant one more time. However, her acquiescence to the $50 limit was also self-serving, as Luke was the least materialistic person alive and choosing gifts for him was a struggle even for Lorelai Gilmore.

"Ok," Luke responded, satisfied. He tore open the first package and removed a thick book. "_No Country for Old Men_," he read aloud.

"Yeah, it's the perfect book for you!" Lorelai interjected happily. You told me you liked Cormac McCarthy and this is one of his new ones and it's got everything you like – guns and drugs and criminals and murder!"

Luke burst out laughing. "Those are my interests?"

Lorelai shrugged. "Well, yes. You like thrillers and true crime stories and reading those profiles of serial killers. Which, now that you mention it, does disturb me the tiniest bit."

Luke kissed her quickly on the lips. "Well, thank you. I need some new things to read."

The present-opening continued, as Luke unveiled another Cormac McCarthy novel, _The Road _("It's got guns and cannibals and a post-apocalyptic wasteland!") and Truman Capote's _In Cold Blood _("Seriously, Luke, that is a _classic_, oh my god. I read it when Rory was 15 and I didn't sleep for weeks.")

"Thank you very much," he said honestly, collecting his new books and placing them on his nightstand.

"You like them?"Lorelai asked earnestly.

He was sometimes still amazed at her hesitance around him. She knew him better than anyone, and yet she still doubted her ability to pick out a present he would like. "Yes," he said, squeezing her arm. "I really, really like them. I can't wait for tonight, when you are rotting your brain with late-night talk shows, and I can read my new books. Now, here." He pushed three packages towards her.

"Ooooh," she said, shaking them excitedly near her ear.

"Are you five?" he asked flatly.

"Maybe," she replied indignantly.

"Just open the presents."

"Which one should I open first?"

He gestured towards a flat square shaped one, which she immediately seized. "Gotta be honest, Luke, I was really hoping for some flannel wrapping paper," she said in faux-disappointment as she ripped off the multi-colored Santa wrap to reveal a large coffee table type book called _Hammerhead Sharks: Demons of the Deep._ She clapped her hands together joyously. "Oh my God! You remembered," she laughed.

Luke nodded, happy with his own success at making her smile. A few months prior, they had been watching some Discovery Channel special about sharks and Lorelai had become briefly obsessed with hammerheads, staying up long after he was asleep to watch the newest program about sharks.

Luke had spent several weeks of breakfasts half-listening to recaps of the previous night's show. "The British guy with the ugly ears? Yeah, well he was trying to track this one shark named Lola to see if she was going to return to the same place in Australia, but Lola like, _figured it out_, and was purposefully going all these weird places to confuse him!"

The end result of this had been Lorelai's insistence that she wanted a pet shark and Luke's utterly rational response that sharks were predators and, more importantly, couldn't possibly live in a bathtub like Lorelai's fish had that one time. So, when he saw the book sitting on a display in the middle of a bookstore, Luke could not resist picking it up.

Lorelai laughed again, pushing the book to the side. "Oh wow, I can't wait to read that. I think you have reignited my shark obsession."

"Oh good. That was exactly what I wanted to happen," he said dryly.

"Which one do I open next?" she asked eagerly. Luke pointed towards one covered in "Happy Hanukkah!" paper that had been sitting in his closet since Christmas 1999. Lorelai had seen it a few weeks earlier and insisted it be used to wrap her gifts.

"The big one."

"The BIG package," she smirked, raising her eyebrows. "_Dirty!_"

Luke rolled his eyes at her, as she had fully expected. But she was already opening the second package, which turned out to be a foot spa. ("Score!")

They discussed this gift for awhile, and then finally Lorelai began to unwrap the small, square box, covered elegantly in silky red paper and a tiny white ribbon.

"This looks fancy," she teased him as she pulled at the loop of the ribbon. "I would guess jewelry but there's no – ," she trailed off as a black velvet box revealed itself under the paper. "– no way it could be jewelry. Luke." She looked at him, perplexed.

"I didn't go over the limit," he said quickly. "Promise," he added, doing the _correct _Scout's Honor symbol.

Lorelai took a deep breath and pushed open the box. "Oh, my," she murmured, removing a delicate silver locker. The face, a slim, shiny oval, was dotted with cut-out stars and a teeny half-moon. "Luke, it's beautiful. I… it's beautiful."

"Open it," he replied in a gravelly voice.

Lorelai did. She had to lean in close to read the minuscule words printed inside of it.

_And the moon's never seen me before  
But I'm reflecting light._

"It's the song we danced to at Liz and TJ's wedding," Luke explained quietly.

"Luke," she said again, staring at him open-mouthed. She wanted to tell him that she knew the song, that she had downloaded the song two weeks after the wedding, that she and Rory had spent hours analyzing the lyrics while he was on his ever-extended trip to Maine. But she said none of this, as his name seemed to be the only word she could formulate.

"Liz made it for me," he explained. "So I didn't go over the limit. It was free. I designed it and I told her exactly how I wanted it, but it was free."

"I… uh... I honestly don't care if you went over the limit," she said, beaming at him.

"Here," he said gently. "Let me put it on." She turned herself around and sat with her back against him as he deftly fastened the tiny clasp behind her neck.

Lorelai ran her hands down the chain. "Luke, this is the most romantic gift I think I've ever gotten."

He wrapped his arms around her and placed his chin over her right shoulder. "I'm glad you like it."

"You totally win pre-Christmas," she laughed as she felt her heart rate returning to normal.

"Well this isn't my first rodeo," Luke responded, hugging her tightly to his chest. "$50 or not, I know you have to have jewelry in order for a holiday to be complete."

Lorelai sighed contentedly. "Maybe."

"Maybe?"

She pulled away from him, grinning when she felt his hands gently clinging to her waist in an attempt to keep her still. "Jewelry is great," Lorelai said as she faced him. "But other things," she trailed off, running her hands over his arms and down his chest. "Other things are better," she whispered into his ear.

Luke groaned lightly and leaned in to kiss her. She felt his smile against her lips. "I think we should do pre-Christmas every year," he said as they fell backwards onto the bed.


End file.
